Year Of The Snake


It’s getting difficult to keep up with all the shit that’s hitting the fan in Scottish football at the moment. Who said what,and when. Who voted which way,or didn’t. Who voted which way,AND didn’t. Which resolution are we voting on? We need an answer by 5pm on Friday,or else! Except the “or else” turns out to mean that you have 28 days to manage the impossible by making Scottish football more ridiculous in the eyes of the footballing world than even the SFA and SPFL can usually manage. 

Of course,in Scotland we have a saying. Wha’s like us? Well,at the moment,nobody. And that’s for sure. The game is paralysed virtually worldwide,but that’s not good enough for us. We want to cut the legs off the game while we are at it,and all in a pathetic display of machismo,egged on by the usual compliant succulent lamb brigade in the media. 

Down south,the miscreants in all this would be the ones getting the legs cut off them-and they’d be thinking themselves lucky to have got off so lightly! Even the FA haven’t got off with it down here. They made the decision about ten days or so ago that all leagues below Tier 6 would be declared null and void. No declarations based on average points or current placings. Nope. Season 19/20 simply didn’t happen and there will be no promotion and no relegation.  

Start again next season. And don’t bother taking us to court,it’s all there in the rule book. 

And the big guns are going ballistic down here about it,and all on behalf of “diddy” teams that they had to look up on Google. And rightly so,too. It’s wrong,and pays no regard to money invested to get promotion this season and begin a march up the leagues. Nor to the fact that it means that all attendance payments should be returned as a result. It’s not just a regulatory screw-up,it’s a logistical and legal minefield. 

And up here,there is no minefield. Only empty stadia filled with empty rhetoric about who said,etc. And plenty of empty heads who need to ask whether the game is really important to them,or is it all about posturing towards your own support,or undermining the spirit of fair play by gerrymandering the rules,and having video conferences in order to avoid the relegation that your clubs have earned by their on-field ineptitude this past season?

Or wanting prize money without any prizes being awarded? Wanting the prize money for finishing second,while denying that you finished second because there were no final placings anyway? Oh,and can we please null and void the season so that those Timmy basterts go f…..g apeshit? 

The last time I saw such a display of petulant selfishness,of me me me,was in an old copy of Viz. Spoiled Bastard. And it’s only a satire,for goodness sake. But it’s them,all right. Spoiled Bastard is every one of those clubs in the upper tier who have not voted in favour of the SPFL resolution which was proposed for one reason,and one reason only. 

It was proposed in order to give the clubs some money which would be due to them shortly in normal times,and which they desperately NEED in order to have any chance of staying alive long enough for just one more fan to click a turnstile. And let’s be honest here,ALL of the clubs involved are in more urgent need of the money than most-so it surely makes sense for them to bite the hand off anyone offering them a grubby white fiver. 

And they know it! So why,then? Well,in the case of Hearts and Partick Thistle,the reason is simple. They want a ruling invoked which will mean that they avoid that so richly deserved relegation I mentioned earlier. In the case of the huns,we already know the lengths they will go to,the depths they will gladly plumb,in order to prevent Celtic winning. This is only another variation on their previous themes of masonic referees and officials,tax avoidance and every type of cheating known to man-more than I can even hint at here due to the libel laws,but we’ve all spoken about it before and after matches. 

Let’s euphemistically suggest that they get fed raw meat at Ibrox,just to fire them up. 

This is Sevco’s last throw of the dice,folks. They know it,we all know it. When the last financial crash arrived,it couldn’t have come at a worse time for Minty. And he knew it. They were already running on fumes while up to their eyeballs in debt. They survived on loans,and even then only because of the money coming in from Europe. But that business model was now wrecked,because the source of the loans was bust-and bust mainly because of toxic loans,like the ones to Murray!

How ironic. 

Additionally,the crash wrecked Murray’s core steelholding business,so he couldn’t prop it up in the meantime. It was a perfect storm for him and them,and the only surprise is that he managed to keep it together-with a little help from his friends-for long enough to get shot of it. Fast forward a dozen years and we have another,sharper,crash-with the additional complication of there being NO money coming through the turnstiles,nor into the coffers of the new chairman who has been underwriting the day to day losses of the current manifestation at Ibrox. 

Douglas Park was already in over his head there,and was long past the stage of throwing good money after bad in the vain hope of getting some of it back. Now? He’s going to need every penny he can lay hands on to keep his main businesses alive,the ones that put him in the position for King to pick his pocket at will. He can’t pony up any more anymore-!-and he is Rangers only hope of any money between now and what is looking increasingly like August at the earliest. 

Unless they get their hands on a few bob from the SPFL in prize money. And they don’t want it-unless they can stop Timmy from being accordingly awarded the title. 

That’s their mentality. That’s the people we are dealing with. Their existence is only there in their eyes to spite us. And in their blind hatred,they are quite happy take the whole of the game down as they themselves commit hari-kari. 

Lie down with dogs,and you get fleas. But when you get into bed with a snake? Don’t be surprised by the result.
Above article by BMCUWP. As always,we are open to offers for Article of the Day. Get the lappy out and start tapping away at it. These 500 chimpanzees are taking too long. Mail your article to Mahe and we will put your name in lights for the day.

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If there are any typos in there,tough. They can stay. Had to type this out on my iPad,mail it to myself. Open the mail on my iPhone and copy it into a text to my work phone-which won’t accept mails from my own account due to heavy-handed security Gestapo.

Then c&p it,open admin on my work phone-which I only managed to do after hours of trying at the weekend!-and c&p the article in.

So aye. The typos can stay.

The Gombeen Man

Great article BMCUWP’S,

The money involved is truly mind boggling down south.
The CL too.
Huge sponsors, huge cash prizes.
All because of a wee bug.
A tiny wee bug… Millions of them could fit into a full stop.

No matter which way they turn it’s a legal minefield.

Politicians blaming each other and Trump blaming the WHO.

It’s almost as if Mother Nature is balancing things out.

Keep safe everyone, stay indoors and hopefully the other wee bug in a computer in Dundee sorts itself out too.

Twists n Turns

Morning all


These incredibly difficult times bring out the best in most people across the world. A sense of looking out for each other and in particular, the most vulnerable in our society.

The football side of things though throws up one very notable exception.

Of course Hearts want reconstruction. I don’t think there is another team in the league who wouldn’t push for it under similar circumstances.

Celtic will want the title played to a finish on the pitch but given that is becoming more and more unlikely, will argue , correctly, that they should be crowned champions.

Aberdeen want to try and claim that European spot if possible, but seem prepared to accept that might not be possible.

Most of the others will accept whatever solution is deemed the best so we can move on and the can get financial relief.

The exception of course is Rangers.

They desperately need money, yet still want to try everything they possibly can to deny Celtic their title, and to ingratiate themselves to their support with their irrational behaviour.
This pandemic has highlighted even further just how low this mob are prepared to stoop and if anyone was unsure as to just how bitter and bigoted their support can be, they’ll be a whole lot more certain now.

Celtic have remained remarkably quiet throughout. I do feel however that our dignified silence , whilst in a normal society would be appropriate, may end up being punished.



Hope you and Y.E.R. family-see what I did there?-are coping as well as can be,mate. Those mad fishermen in the village must be dying for a hoolie!

Trump is basing his argument on a single tweet from the early days of The WHO investigation in China,which reported that Chinese efforts had shown no human to human transmission. This was swiftly overturned by the WHO’s own investigations which showed otherwise.

So a spiteful arse withdraws half a billion of much-needed finance based on one,swiftly overturned,tweet?

This,of course,from a man who,when faced with the evidence of his own regular imbecility on Twitter,calls it fake news.

Now,I’ll be honest. When I lived in London in the 90s,there were damn few Americans I didn’t get on with within seconds of meeting them. Dated a few too,so maybe I just got lucky. Maybe it’s true that a lot of Americans just don’t leave the country,I dunno. I do know that I wouldn’t wish a president like that on the ones that I met

But the ones that voted for him? Well,they deserve him. It’s just a pity that the rest of us have to suffer too.



I’m long past second-guessing the intentions of Celtic. But I do think that they know that they were lucky to get away with the 5WA,Res 12 and the publication of the mail regarding it. And a few other things on the same subject-remind me to tell you a cracker re PL and a couple of well-known bloggers some day.

Which is why I think they are treading very carefully here. They knew that they could hide behind a collective decision to keep Sevco in the league,albeit the bottom tier which they didn’t qualify to enter. That suited them,some of us suspected it,and we all know it to be true now.

But they must know-surely tae fuck!-that we will not meekly accept a null and void for the same alleged reason.

The Gombeen Man

Someone at WHO must be a chancer.

On the 30th of January this outbreak was declared a by the WHO as a Public Health Emergency of International Concern or PHEIC.

How do they pronounce a PHEIC?

Yip a FAKE.

The suits must be tearing their hair out though.

Pandemics happened in 1890, 1918, 1957,1968 and 2009. Can’t remember football stopping.

Thankfully we’re a bit more enlightened and cognisant of what’s going on. The Trumps of this world can’t ignore what’s going on quite as easily.

1918 was by far the most serious and hopefully the measures we’re taking will save many lives. Any pandemic is a serious but if something like 1918 were to occur it would be a catastrophe. That’s why Boris had to back off from his Charge of the Light Brigade approach.

Sevco’s exploration of this crisis is galling.

They’re desperate for any soundbite from Celtic to castigate us as villains.

Sevco have their sights on the professionals on the SPFL Board.They see them as Desmond’s/Lawwell plants.

Or that’s what they are selling to their followers. They are displacing blame, anger but mostly fear onto others.

“Don’t blame me. It’s his fault.”

Kindergarten stuff and they’ll buy it.

With a complicit media and a PLC that’s motivated primarily by profit I think many of us have been down this road before.

The best solution is for UEFA to make a call at European level. Financially that’s a huge call and our headache must be multiplied by who knows what.

No matter how noble your intentions they’ll be twisted by the cynical and self centred.

Who knows when we’ll be back playing?

Who knows what the football landscape will look like after this?

Thankfully we’ve some money to tide us over. The main priority is protecting our families and not allowing Sevco’s sickness ( they are very sick) to make us all unwell.

Feck them. They are broke, trophy less and what would they give to be in our position?

Maybe Sevco will demand the 7-1 game is null and voided maybe our first Nine too.

The Gombeen Man


I think the síbín (shebeen) might make a come back. Either that or they’ll head up to Armagh or Down if the Brits open up first.

Funny how it only take a minute wee bug to destabilse superpowers and the global economy.

Any word from TET?



I’d invite them here,they were brilliant lads! I’m sure they’d find a way to manoeuvre entry into one of the locked up pubs round here. Which is a thought…

Tell them to pop over,and they can show me how to do it as well! Certainly be quicker than standing in a bloody queue at Asda.

Though I do have a cunning plan for Friday morning. A dawn raid. All a bit hush hush at the moment,touches nose with finger.

Morrisons opens early,and I hope to get in and out,then round to Aldi,Sainsbury and Asda for when they open. It’s not just me I’m thinking of,I have a mate who stays on the first floor in his building but is physically incapable of carrying even one case home and up the stairs. I got him two last week and left them outside his door on Saturday. He’ll have been choking now since Sunday,I expect!

He phoned me on Monday to thank me,as if he needed to. Saturday was his birthday,and he reckoned it was bad enough that it would be his first birthday in 45 years-when he turned 16-that he wouldn’t have been in the pub. That’s bad enough but the thought of a dry birthday was driving him mental. And worse.

Another life saved,haha!

It is pretty serious for the less fortunate amongst us though. Even neighbours cant pop in for a cup of tea and a natter,etc. Gonna be a lot of mental illness to deal with after this,I reckon. Social animals,not meant to be cooped up.


Bloody hell,apparently Dundee had intimated that they would make a decision yesterday at 5pm. Full SPFL board meeting called,awaiting…


And as a result,Wacko in the record headlines his article that the hun resolution is now back on the table?! WT almighty F?

Never mind keeping the powder dry,our lot had better be getting it distributed to their best marksmen. Wi an extra rifle,and someone on hand to do the reloading for them. And I suggest they call Mr Gattling while they are at it.


Not read back. On bbc news Ashley is looking to sell Newcastle £300 million to middle eastern buyers. should we be afraid? c depend what happens he may buy thems, easier access to Europe, higher profile etc.



I see your point,but I think that the grief he received at Newcastle will have sickened him against further involvement in the game. Add in that he knows the finances of that club inside out-from when his guys were in nominal control pre-King and since then via various court cases-I’d think that as a businessman he would say no,though possibly in a more colourful fashion.

Additionally,he has taken a bit of a kicking in the last two or three years on his speculative punts into big names with no future. Think House of Fraser,Debenhams and a number of others. He’s not the man with the Midas touch any more,and I think he is coming to realise that. Stick to what you’re good at,a pretty good maxim in business,as in life.


I think the post at 9.12, is for you, if she’s Dutch ??

The Gombeen Man


Dermot will have two priorities,

Staying alive and making money.

It’s that simple.

Scottish football is broken and Sevco want to bring back the days of Jim Farry and his nonsense.
Infact the Dundee farce is reminiscent of Cadete’s registration.

The longer this goes on the more difficult it becomes to prop up the unsustainable game.

The money will run out.

I hope the SPFL are bombproof legally if they pay out winnings with the prospect of an undecided league.

Sevco have already wound up Ladbrokes.

Maybe a bankrupt administration would suit Sevco?

The Gombeen Man

Looks like the increased traffic is attracting a wider audience.

Not sure how that industry is dealing with social distancing.


I was talking to a couple of guys that remember 2016. Young John Paul was asking for you both. His mother Gabrielle of Star of the Sea passed away a couple of years ago. I was at the funeral…packed.


Good morning All!

BMCUWP…. great read!

R****rs Mk1 died chasing Big Ears
R****rs Mk2 will die trying to stop the 10

UEFA are the biggest problem as it’s all about the money …. yet they pick and choose on who’s fallen foul of FFP rules….

Time for a clear out at the SPFL – independent board with no affiliation with any club (avoids conflicted bawbags of the Hun variety)

2012 should have been a fresh start but the SPFL were complicit in the birth of the blue morons from ibrokes ….. current shit show is all karma ….

I would rather Celtic wait this out for a couple of months by which time UEFA will have to implement season end with declaring all league winners across the members within.

With no incoming funds, no kit supplier, no stadium betting facility, more than likely no sponsors …. the Huns will implode and you will hear the Park bus reversing out of Govan faster than More-or-less’ Lamborghini!

Time is on our side.

Stay safe!




I think Ladbrokes took the decision about two years ago not to renew ANY deals in football. So no more sponsorship,no more in-stadia betting kiosks.

As soon as the contract is up,offski.

Which means that there is another revenue stream cut off for the huns. Same as their retail deals,their lack of a shirt manufacturer. Fortunately for them,they won’t need anyone to front up the pies every fortnight,not for a while anyway.



Sorry to hear of his Mum’s passing,mate. Give him and the others our best wishes,please. I remember one of them saying to us,something like,do you fellas know where yer staying tonight?

Aye,of course we dae! Head to the Main Street,sorted.

Well,says he. That’s straight on. Don’t turn left,because its helluva wet that way!

Smashin’ wee place,and my Dad and I talk about it often. He gets that glint in his eye,the one that says-be rude not to go back! Plus,of course,the site of the Boyne,and the ancient cemetery with the huge tower. Eerie place,that one.

Very grateful for those couple of days,mate. Little wonder you moved there.

The Gombeen Man


It’ll be putting pressure on about the prizemoney.


Good analysis Bobby. An almighty cluster…. comes to mind. “Good things come to those who wait “…hopefully.

The Gombeen Man

Yep and almost every fishing boat called Celtic.



Welcome back,mucker!

UEFA could well be a fly in the ointment. Their priority will be to protect their own income stream,then it will be those who in the main provide that. Which is the big boys in the big leagues.

We could well be viewed by them as a diddy League,in the same way that the FA viewed their own diddy leagues. Null and void. Who cares,I’m all righ,Jack

As for independents with no hun affiliation,that’s an oxymoron in Scotland. Unless,of course,they know nothing about football and could care even less.

Which means that the perfect person for the job is my Mum. And if she can keep my Dad and me on the straight and narrow,she’s a shoo-in for the job. One look’s enough,Harvey. Trust me.



Haha,even the blue ones! I remember that.



Cheers,mate. Hope all is well and that the wedding is still on for June.

I’m not sure that I’d like our board to be waiting. I’d prefer them to be preparing for an onslaught. The huns are in a fight for survival,and they know the lifebelts have been returned under the HP terms. They won’t care who they take out. It’s scorched earth,and our lot had better be ready to fight dirty. Even if they think that such a thing is beneath them-because the huns sure as hell don’t!

The Gombeen Man

Yes, it’s still the same.

Dermot used to own quite a slice of shares in Ladbrokes. They’ll have more to worry about with the shops closed and not too much to bet on.
It was Dermot’s company BETDAQ was supposed to help them catch up in the online market.
They used to have a sympathetic CEO too. He’s running REACH PLC, it used to be called the Trinity Mirror Group.
At least Sevco are giving them something to write about, can’t say they’ve improved the quality of their journalism.



Problem is that Trinity Mirror formed Reach by amalgamating with the Express group of newspapers. Long time since there was a decent journalist employed by the latter.



So true about the oxymoron analogy!

I wonder if Ladbroke are taking bets on when Celtic will be crowned Champions… be funny to see posters splashed out on advert boards to wind up the knuckle draggers!

I’ll vote for your mum! As long as she takes my missus on board …. she handles plenty of brats as a teacher so she’s more than qualified to put a few on their arse at the back of the class!

Awe Naw


are you an architect ?

The Gombeen Man


As far as the media goes, you are what you eat. So best to be prudent about what you consume.

On another note.

A prominent Australia based blogger has been pretty vocal about the origins of SARs-CoV-2 on another Blog.

He must have forgotten about the Sydney Flu epidemic in the UK in 1999. It was believed to have been brought here by Australian rugby supporters.

Funny how things can slip the mind.

Till Later,

Twists n Turns

Still feeling under the weather. Convinced this fkn lock in is the cause. Not meant to be caged in. So I just went and covered 4 miles through here. Right on my doorstep…almost literally. Lovely place .

Gonna start running this route daily.

Already feel better:


Morning all, another suitable topic Bobby, Lunatics are running the asylum springs to mind. Hope you feel better soon Twists, be careful out exercising though. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 82 now and we don’t know where the hell she is. ?

Awe Naw


With a hernia?

Twists n Turns

Awe Naw
Yeah. The hernia will get dealt with at some point. I was having an inguinal hernia sorted a few years back. The surgeon said to me “ you realise that’s a hernia too… pointing to my stomach “

Told him no, but he said, as long as it’s not bothering you it’s not worth touching it.

It’s just now I realised it’s getting worse so I’ll get an appointment when this crisis is over. Until then I’m sure it’ll be fine. Hope so! ?

Twists n Turns



The auld yin’s are the best eh!

Awe Naw


Yeah take it easy if you get stitch stop before they really have to stitch

bada bing1

Twists- the gloves just arrived, they will be going to good homes,thank you and your good lady,a typically generous gesture from you.

bada bing1

And many thanks to Weebawbabbity for his wonderful offer too.

bada bing1

Were the huns asking the SPFL for an interest free loan, over and above any prize money they were due?

Twists n Turns

I’m sure they’ll be useful.

My daughter has just been called and asked if she can do a “massive favour” and go and nurse in a care home for the next week and a half as they’re desperate.
She is a qualified nurse but works in a management role.
A favour? Hmmmm. That is indeed a favour.

That’ll be my blood pressure at overload until she gets through this.

No point in me trying to persuade her not to. One it would be selfish and two she wouldn’t listen to me anyway.


You are not wrong Bobby, re adopting the Boy Scout motto. The old adages of KISS (Keep it Simple, Stupid) and PPPPPP (Prior Preparation Prevents Piss Poor Performance) are entirely appropriate in this scenario.

Wedding in June is off for now sadly. Now, about that Hoot in Belfast then instead… oh, wait a minute!!

The Gombeen Man


First it was prize money for second place…
But play league later….

“Okay, What if you come in third?”

“We’ll pay back the difference”

“So it’s a loan then?”

“Well, kind of.”

“What if UEFA call it and we can’t play the games?”

“Well it is a loan then.”

“But we can a make loan without calling it prizemoney. The sponsors put up prizemoney not loans.”

“The sponsors are all Fenians and Nationalists anyway, what about Hearts. Null and void it but we demand the money ”

“What about the CL and Europa places with no league winners or runners up?”

“Suspend Doncaster.”



Yes I am an Architect …. currently on furlough.

I take it you may KNOW me?

Awe Naw


yes I still have the compromising pics of you and Mr M. Hay. 🙂 did you misplace my bank account number ?




Was that your dodgy Nigerian account???

Mrs Hay sends her regards ?

Awe Naw


Dubaibhoy also posts on here he was a fellow alcoholic with Mr Hay in The Wee Red also and shared a house in The Big Smoke.

you might know him too

Hope you the wife and weans are keeping safe



I could do with being back in Dubai myself!!

You’ll have to send me a message in LinkedIn as I haven’t worked out you yet!

Wife and kids fine …. they’re all grown up! My eldest will have to buy me pints soon!

Awe Naw


Linkedin ….. aye that´s me 🙂 CC

bada bing1

THE SPFL have reportedly told clubs there will be no football played until mid-August.

A statement from the joint response group last week revealed all levels of the game in Scotland were postponed until 10 June

bada bing1

Floodlit Dominoes live on Sky Sports 1 tonight


There are some strange sports getting TV coverage just now. Unless I had heavy drink taken, I swear I saw 5 minutes of a sport which involved 2 teams, each with a juggler at the back of the court . This juggler was defended by a girl sitting atop a tall man’s shoulders whose job it was to fend off thrown objects at the juggler.

The other 3 or 4 players in the team ran around to fire off, what looked like bean bags, to try to put the juggler off his stroke.

It truly was the seminal work of competitive sport as derived for the Acid Generation.

bada bing1

Could be the end of September before the new season starts,probably need to be a 14/16 team league, and play less games

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