Noisy Neighbours


Not an awful lot happening on Planet Fitba’ at the moment as I know you are all aware. So maybe we should be grateful for the pantomime act over on the south side of town as our noisy neighbours continue to throw their toys about the place in the manner of the typical spolilt seven year old brat who just isn’t getting his way. 

Spare the rod and spoil the child,as the old adage says. In this case,of course,the brat actually wants rid of the rod altogether! To be precise,Rod McKenzie,along with Neil Doncaster and Murdoch McLennan,the three top honchos at the SPFL. Their crime? Well,it’s difficult to say. The charges against them from the huns seem to alter with every statement they issue,and despite holding evidence of wrongdoing and malfeasance,they refuse to elaborate any further. 

It’s a strange way to demand clarity in the game,isn’t it? To make such serious allegations against people,threatening their livelihoods not to mention any remaining stability in the game,while not giving any suggestion as to what these allegations are? Naturally,our fearless bloodhounds in the press are all over this,quite rightly demanding that Rangers put up or shut up,and give at the very least outline details of the charges they wish to raise and the reasons why they believe them to be appropriate. 

Except,as usual,they aren’t. 

As ever,a missive from Ibrox is treated as Holy Writ and must be supported,and repeated at every opportunity. There has been barely a word of criticism of the way that Tangers have gone about this witch hunt-or wild goose chase,as I prefer to think of it. Certainly not in our mainstream media. There may well be questions to be answered,but we will never know unless we know what those questions,those allegations are. And it seems to be one of them secret things that nipple-baring types are so obsessed with. 

Meantime,the huns continue with their demands that the three targets of their ire are suspended pending investigation into unspecified allegations. Now that is a breach of natural justice as their reputations will be forever tarnished by such a suspension,and we know that even if they are found to be wholly innocent of the as yet unspecified allegations,those suspensions will be cast up again and again by an entirely unaccountable press cadre as they do their masters’ bidding. 

In my opinion,it is time for the SFA-who have barely uttered a word in public in the last month while the game for which they hold supreme supervisory and regulatory authority is in danger of implosion-to issue a demand of their own. It may be argued that they have no jurisdiction over SPFL matters,that that will not hold water. They are abdicating their responsibilities on this one. It is time for them to tell Rangers to put up or shut up. To release the information that they have told the world that they have in their possession and to allow due process within the SPFL to take place thereafter. Or to withdraw any allegations and to refrain from further muddying of the waters. 

Or to face a charge of bringing the game into disrepute. 

It is now over a week that this mud-slinging has been going on. The game in Scotland has bigger things to worry about than the egos of certain figures within an already toxic club. They have done enough damage to Scottish football over the years and have yet to learn the meaning of humility or collectivism as a result. It is time for Scottish football as a whole to show such collectivism and impose that much-needed humility on its problem child. 


Above article by BMCUWP. If you are twiddling your thumbs over the next day or two,twiddle them at your keyboard and send us an article. Get your name in lights for the day. Mail it to Mahe.

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Twists n Turns
April 20, 2020 4:25 am

Morning bobby
Yer early today amigo?

Trying to catch me oot?

Just been on the phone to NHS 24. That’s me 8 days now coughing like a madman. Never slept a wink last night ( or indeed Friday or Saturday with it)

That’s why I missed yer quiz btw! Fell asleep on chair at 7pm didn’t wake up till 8-45pm ?

April 20, 2020 4:26 am

From previous.

How about this idea?

UEFA announce The Long Spoon Champions League played in different cities across Europe every weekend for next season.

The top teams from each league are involved and dont play in their domestic competition if there is one.

The proceeds of the TLSCL where TV Companies sell access globally are paid out on a solidarity basis.

Players with no wage competition in their favour play for the equivalent of £25k a year or whatever is deemed to be the average working man wage across Europe. It’s that or no club to sue.

The big clubs recognise that they need smaller clubs for a host of reasons, player development, cannon fodder, keeping football and community aligned , so they play on a cost neutral base.

The proceeds after these costs get paid to national associations free to devise the spend to keep clubs turning over or mothballed until their national league starts.

Sponsors would queue up to be involved to add to TV income.

Logistics to be worked out including safety but easier to implement over say 40 clubs than 1000.

In short UEFA assume responsibility to lead the clubs through difficult times.

Unthinkable 3 months ago, but that was then, this is now for an unknown while.

April 20, 2020 4:27 am

All for res.12.adverts in papers etc,then a 180,bought off for 40 pieces of silver
A Judas in my book.
Never forgiven
Paul Brennan.
That puzzled me especially his reluctance to add Res12 to the Judicial Review being pushed that got nowhere because it lacked the locus Res12 did have. Then no reporting from 2018 AGM after hard evidence of false pretence turned up.

Turned out Winning Captains was the driver

From previous.

Twists n Turns
April 20, 2020 4:33 am

I should add, so as not to mislead:

NO Covid symptoms other than the cough!’

No temperature, no loss of appetite, nowt. Cough only.

Told me to take paracetamol and drink lots of water.

Will do but feel I need something more? Hey ho. I’ll dae whit I’m telt…..

April 20, 2020 4:34 am


Bloody hell,mate. Not good at all. Hope the Helpline either put your mind at rest or gave you the advice you need. Either way,take good care and it sounds like yer indoors for a wee while to come.

Sleeping for nearly fourteen hours,tut tut. That’s nearly a week’s worth by your standards.

Posted the new article a bit earlier than usual as I’d finished by 2am this morning. My colleague phoned me at 10pm to say that was him on his way back from Oxford. I hadn’t even set my alarm till 11pm,so he kinda caught me off guard. Body clock out of kilter already-and it’s only Monday!

April 20, 2020 4:35 am


Lager is approx 96% water. Just saying,like. Dae whit yer telt,regardless.

Twists n Turns
April 20, 2020 4:44 am

Ha, if only I was a lager drinker!

Oh I’m not bothered. Just fed up with the cough now. Worse at nights. Probably cos I’m lying down?

I’ll go get paracetamol at 8am but I’m not sure how that will help a bad cough? Still, as you say, I’ll follow the advice. Be fun n games right enough if I’m walking around the supermarket coughing!! Better wear a face mask I guess.

April 20, 2020 4:52 am


That’s not a bad suggestion as an outline,though would obviously need some fine tuning. For instance,I genuinely don’t think the players at that level would be interested at £25k pa. Which team would represent a country-champions-elect for 2020 or the last crowned champions from 2019. Would insurance be a problem,as I think it would. Etc.

That’s mainly nitpicking,as the concept can be fine tuned. But it will need to be quick. As it stands,the smaller clubs are much less impacted by this. Most of the players are receiving a decent %age of their normal wages and club loss of income is less severe at those levels. They will generally survive in much the same state as before. The elite will have enough to overcome even the large losses in income,much of which should be covered by insurance payouts anyway.

The problem is the median clubs,as you rightly point out. Those who are outwith the super elite. Strip out clubs which have sovereign wealth or oligarch/plutocrat/industrialist backing and the European game will resemble the aftermath of a nuclear winter. The game will have a decision to make. Do they watch these clubs-whose joint support,history and income outstrips those of the super elite-go to the wall,or do they recognise the value that they provide to the overall game and support them accordingly?

What you are advocating verges on communism in perhaps the most capitalist of sporting business,but as ever,these are unprecedented times. Personally,I think the me me me brigade will win out,so your plan or similar will not even be considered.

And that’s where,in time,the me me me brigade will come to recognise the ground zero of their long slow suicide.

April 20, 2020 4:54 am


Bacardi is 62.5% water. Only trying to help. Add in the water content of the cola. After all,you know what Noel Coward said about water,and why he wouldn’t drink it.

Twists n Turns
April 20, 2020 5:06 am

No – tell me! ( Noel Coward…. save me googling) ?

Twists n Turns
April 20, 2020 5:13 am

Later today I’ll screenshot ye a bet I put on at Gulfstream .

I’ve spent a few days studying up on trainers jockeys stats etc.

Stuck 5 on the other night. Draw is absolutely critical over there. It’s a bit like Chester. Get caught wide, yer fekked.

Anyhow the results?


I’d trebles , each way 4’s and each wAy accy.

Good returns, but, that one place cost me big time. Hey ho. Only blessing was it was the first one that let me down for the 5 and not the last, though, the cash out would’ve been interesting had it been the last.

April 20, 2020 5:21 am


Well done,mate. Astonishing results,given so little prior knowledge.

The Hong Kong tracks are also like Chester,if you are interested. In fact,Happy Valley-not sure that is still in use,mind-makes Chester look like Cheltenham!

If I’m honest,I’m not really missing my regular trips to the bookies. It would be different if I couldn’t go,but there was racing and football available to bet on. I reckon the flat season will be write-off for me this season,and I’ll pick it up when the jumps kick back in in earnest around mid-October. As for the football,not got a clue when it will be worth betting on again.

April 20, 2020 5:24 am


I found this,attributed to WC Fields.

“never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.”

Noel Coward’s version was similar but more direct!

Afghan melon - formerly Cplchlc
April 20, 2020 6:06 am


Try bronchostop, usually available at most supermarkets & doesn’t affect most other medications, Always check.
i have used it & it tends to ease the coughing then stop it pretty quickly.
Hope this is useful ?

April 20, 2020 7:10 am

Excellent article Bhoys ??

big packy
April 20, 2020 8:28 am

MORNING ALL and JIM, bobby great article as usual, but don’t forget its bonny scodland we are talking about here, the famous glesca rainjurs rule the roost?

April 20, 2020 8:29 am

Good morning all from Govanhill. Good article Mick, but we all know that the huns will never change. Time they disappeared for good.

big packy
April 20, 2020 8:32 am

TWISTY, was wondering where you were, hope the cough gets better soon ,the mrs always takes a cough mixture called covonia when she has a cough, always seems to work for her?

big packy
April 20, 2020 8:33 am

morning bigraiilroad blues?

April 20, 2020 8:45 am

Good Morning Bhoys and Ghirls from a fine and sunny Dundee.
Whit ur they like, eh Bobby.
TnT, if you can, raise your head in bed to help with the coughing, hope you recover soon

The Gombeen Man
April 20, 2020 8:54 am

Sorry to read TNT’s coughing has persisted. Over here we’ve been told if you are unwell continue to go to the doctor.
I’m not sure what the story is in Scotland but it might be worth making a call.

Anyway, great read BMCUWP’S this incoherent megaphone diplomacy from Ibrox is tiresome and pretty toxic.

The concept of evidence seems to have failed to make the grade in Scotland. We all know the litany of proven transgressions by Ibrox and the failings of the administration but Mr Park’s distress call doesn’t need the trivialities of substance.

I suppose we shouldn’t be surprised that the subtleties of substantive evidence and proof aren’t paramount given the secretive kulchur of Scottish society.

Since the football stopped all we have left is the suits and idle hacks looking to make a crust. Furlough them all, I say.

I did notice a thread on Sevco media a couple of weeks ago about ST renewals. The consensus was not to renew given the performance of the team, board and the timing.

With the adoption of the victim card and ensuing anger, that’s changed. The Sevs are right behind the board and posting their support for the brave few standing up against tyranny.

A clever bit of marketing, a distraction and settling of scores? Preparation for a bit of bad news?

What about Celtic. All quiet.

I’ve always subscribed to the theory that the PLC views the Old Firm support as Dumb and Dumber.

Which half they view as the Dumber is anybody’s guess.

I’m not even convinced that 9 or 10 is the board’s priority. The bottom line is the priority and the more heat and toxicity there is the healthier is the bottom line.

Trouble is this wee bug has stopped the tills ringing and is eating into the bottom line.

Keep safe.


April 20, 2020 9:09 am

O/T don’t know if it has been mentioned, I enjoyed together at home concert last night on bbc 1, great performances by all artists. paired down songs.
my faves Rag n Bone Man-Times they are a changing, Andrea Bocelli, Lady Gaga, Celine Dionne-The Prayer, Kingdom Choir-you male me feel my love ( had to leave room, tears).
Also the rolling stones-can’t always get what you want. Packy bet you can’t play drums like Charlie did amazing sound and technique, new concept air drums. beat that ?????

Twists n Turns
April 20, 2020 9:10 am

Hi bhoys
Thanks for the concern and advice. So far I’ve went through 2 x large cough bottles which didn’t help. I’d better lay off them for now and follow the water plus paracetamol suggestion from the NHS 24.

I’ve also been propped up in bed which definitely helps a bit but not enough tbh.

Anyhow – folks , including the medics, with more important things to worry about I’m sure than a smoker with a cough!

Always feel guilty about being a smoker when coughing breaks out. The answer is pretty obvious eh, if not easy!

When I phoned up I felt like starting the conversation with “ Bless me Doctor for I have smoked, it is 10 minutes since my last JPS real blue king size”

Really really really need to fkn size up and just stop.

The only time I never think about having a smoke is when exercising.

Maybe I should take a couple weeks out and go out 6-8 times a day till I’ve broke the habit?

Anyway – as I say amigos, your kind concern is noted and appreciated. I’ll keep you informed. If you don’t hear from me, don’t worry, I’ll probably be out buying fags. ( that’s cigarettes got you USA bhoys – just to avoid confusion)

☠️ ? ???? ? ? ?? ☠️

big packy
April 20, 2020 9:19 am

HI MARIO, yes Charlie is really something, still going strong at 78?

April 20, 2020 9:21 am

Good read, BMCUW.
Thank you.
Also that’s Celtic Wiki back up and running, which for the like of me is great news.
A tremendous asset for The Celtic community.

April 20, 2020 9:23 am

Just catching up with you.
Please look after yourself and I hope you recover very soon.

big packy
April 20, 2020 9:25 am

TWISTY, my dad smoked roll ups with licorice cigarette paper, looked like tiny cigars, ang guess who had to go up to mr sneddons newsagent and get them for him, yours truly, maybe that’s why I don’t smoke???

April 20, 2020 9:41 am

Sky Sports News just now,

Zoom conference all things Hun, Souness, Defoe etc.

Sickening Zoomers

big packy
April 20, 2020 9:45 am

AFF oot now to get my mother in law and the old lady next door some supplies, just my luck she is allergic to cows milk, ive got to go to a farm shop in Knutsford about a 20 minute drive away, to get her some goats milk, I hope the police don’t stop me and ask is this an essential journey?? catch u later

The Gombeen Man
April 20, 2020 9:48 am

Carlton Tongues,

No doubt Souness was saying that Liverpool shouldn’t be awarded the EPL.
If it can’t be played out, it should be voided?

April 20, 2020 10:30 am

The Gombeen Man,

Only heard a couple of seconds it consisted of:

How good is Gerrard?
How would Moreorless do in England?
What happened in Dubia as you were playing so well?

Turned off.

HH and Back to Work

April 20, 2020 11:17 am

Morning all. HH

The Gombeen Man
April 20, 2020 11:46 am


The women here ditched the fantasy football on Sky for Disney Plus at the start of the lockin. It’s more believable.
Don’t work too hard.


Morning, great to see you back. Really enjoy your posts.


April 20, 2020 11:52 am

Good morning to all and Packy. And Weefra.

April 20, 2020 11:57 am

The Gombeen Man

Great to be back buddy, and thank you.

April 20, 2020 11:59 am


Thanks jim am away to make lunch. Yummy. ???HH

April 20, 2020 12:03 pm

BMCWP…..Did you give the nightshift time off for good behaviour……

Have we been awarded our title yet….

April 20, 2020 12:06 pm

Good article Bobby. The whole issue is ridiculous.
When a person is arrested it is made known to them why they are being arrested. ‘John Smith, I am arresting you for……’

In court the accused is informed at the outset what the charges are.

As far as I’m aware all the evidence to be used in the trial has to be shared with the defence & prosecution. (MIT could advise?)

So imagine the Board of the SPFL have Doncaster and MacLellan in front of them. “Gentlemen, we are suspending you with immediate effect because………….” Turn to each other, “Why?” “What for?” “What’s the reason again?”

Mr. McKenzie your services are no longer required for the same reasons above!

April 20, 2020 12:10 pm

Just to be clear, I’m no fan of Doncaster! But everyone is entitiled to a fair legal process.

To suspend people from their employment the ‘charges’ and evidence must be made known. at the very least.

April 20, 2020 12:20 pm

Joe public: “Officer I want this man arrested!”
P.C.: “Why sir?”
Joe public: “I’ll tell you after you have arrested him!”

Awe Naw
April 20, 2020 12:29 pm

Gray said: “What we have is a situation where fans are being asked to buy season tickets for a season we don’t know when it’ll kick off

“As a board, we have looked long and hard at the medical evidence, government evidence and so on. Whether we have gone too early or not will only be borne out in time.

“But the reality is I don’t think we will be playing football again before September/October. That’s my view. It would also be the view of the majority of the board. There is only one board member who doesn’t think that.”

April 20, 2020 12:43 pm

Good afternoon noisy neighbour haters.
Are chinny chin chin and the rolled up trouser legs over at the good ship aye-broke still claiming that, absence of evidence is not evidence of absence ?
Whatever the fsck that means ?

April 20, 2020 12:47 pm

Awe Naw

If this situation continues i can see the board offloading high earners(stars) to leagues that open up before us or even just transferring them in the window incase there is no return to full stadiums till the start of next season …..season book sales and matchday revenue will be a big loss .

April 20, 2020 1:00 pm


I think that’s termed an unknown unknown. Or something

April 20, 2020 1:01 pm

Don’t suppose this fella will be getting invited back onto the BBC

April 20, 2020 1:06 pm

Some team apart from him being in goal !

Former Celtic and Republic of Ireland goalkeeper Pat Bonner picks the best XI he has played with and, after a bit of persuasion from his fellow Sportsound pundits on BBC Radio Scotland, put himself between the sticks.

“I want to pick a team that could maybe compete in the modern game,” Bonner told BBC Scotland.

So who else did Bonner pick in his dream XI?

Danny McGrain: I was playing in the Celtic reserves and Danny was there because he was coming back from injury. He was a huge influence. He was brilliant from a motivation point of view, but he was also strict – he told you what he thought. But just to be alongside Danny and play with him, and what a player.

Denis Irwin: Denis was a cultured full-back. He was in that Manchester United side that won the Champions League. He was a brilliant player.

Roy Aitken: Mick McCarthy could handle himself. He was a great organiser, and I could have picked him, but Roy Aitken had great strength, pace, he was unbelievably fit and strong. In the modern game you’d pick him because he would be able to get on the ball and build from the back.

Paul McGrath: Paul was an incredible player, world class. If I had to pick out the world class players I played with, Paul would be number one.

Paul McStay: He had this unbelievable ability to take the ball down in any situation. A brilliant player.

Roy Keane: Roy was a difficult guy to get to know. He had an unbelievable ability to make difficult things look simple. His most memorable game for Ireland was against Netherlands in the build-up to the 2002 World Cup. It was an incredible performance.

Liam Brady: He was magnificent, a world class player. I played against him when he was in that great Juventus team in the early 80s. He was very quiet, but a great guy and good fun.

Davie Provan: He had some bit of class. In the modern game he would be an out and out winger but he could do more than that. He could get on the ball and do things.

Frank McAvennie: What a player. Frank had it all. He could head the ball, he could run, he could score goals, he could be cheeky, he could defend, he could close people down.

Tommy Burns: Left foot, cultured, but he drove manager Billy McNeil mad because he would run all over the place and Billy would tell him to stay on the left, but when Tommy was a manager he would preach the same thing to his players.

April 20, 2020 1:14 pm

Oglach i remember doing a few flat renovations in Glasgows west end and Packie and another Celtic player (who i can’t recall just now) had a cleaning service business, their company would do the final clean, before the flats were put on the market for sale. They got out of a car one day, and i couldn’t quite make out if it was Packie, until his colleague threw the car keys at Bonner, and he dropped them, i knew then it was definitely him.

April 20, 2020 1:17 pm

Twists N Turns
Stay safe & well sir.

April 20, 2020 1:47 pm

Twisty, never heard of Afghan’s cough remedy but sounds good. I like Night Nurse, the original one, not the ‘non drowsy’ version, because it helps you get a good sleep too.

A thing of beauty
April 20, 2020 1:49 pm

I see you have been offered lots of advice so thought I would add my own which sound crazy but has worked for me. Before going to bed rub some vicks vaporub on the soles of your feet, put on a pair of socks and go to sleep. Like I said crazy but a few people have tried it since and also said it works.
You probably should give up, the fags but as an ex smoker who misses it everyday my over riding feeling is jealousy, especially just now. All I seem to do is eat and clean. Even when I lost my sense of taste after having some virus, or the virus I was still eating. Wtf? I couldn’t even taste the chocolate and I was still piling it in.