Where’s Me Budgiesmugglers,Sheila? Estadio Rides Again!


I received this on Saturday morning from our esteemed roving correspondent in Australia. Wonderful to hear from him again,and hopefully he will update us on his travels and travails.

Well! Saturday/Glasgow…. Sunday/Perth! 

What can I say?

I suppose for me “32” immediately springs to mind! 

Everywhere I turned on streets, ear-wigged chats, glimpsed tablets or phones, my eyes, ears and senses filtered away the surrounding substance leaving…. ”32…32…32”.

Saturday of course had been defibrillation at it most erratic. Celtic’s style of play under Ange is undoubtedly one of ‘score more than they do’ but my two stents, angina and post TIA tenterhooks could do with a bit less of its consequential by-product of dangling us all over the edge of a volcanic precipice and then for the wanton quantum deviants of universal destiny to unleash the ‘let’s play five a side at the back’   and laughingly shove us towards the fiery abyss of doom and utter chaos far below.

Mind you fair play to those purveyors of chaos theory, they did at least leave me a get out from the agony of eternally roasting nuts that beckoned…..well a sort of get-out.

As the flatline of oblivion beckoned, what was that tugging and slowing my descent? 

A parachute perhaps? A bunjee rebound……if only…..but no!

For me as the game entered its last few minutes it seemed that any hope I had of avoiding the fatal fire of football’s fate had in fact been secured but only with an ever shortening noose, constricting my breathing, my airways, tightening ….. tightening … tighteninggggggggg! 

What had the voices on the airwaves who were there I thought to elucidate, enhance and widen my understanding of this marvellous game? Well, what they provided was a take your pick of banal pointless and irrelevant clichés.

”Devil and deep blue sea’, ‘frying pan or fire’, ‘someone needs to do something’, ‘he’s got a card or two up his sleeve’!

Oh how Hobson would have clapped in glee as (and I’m not sure it was just metaphorical) my hands autonomously reach for that Gordian knot constricting my gullet and blood flow while simultaneously thrusting my knees in a burpee away from the encroaching heat of hades…..bloodied/broken nose or roasted nuts….or just roasted nuts….what a choice.

I turned the sound off. Doom and destruction may have been inevitable, but I’d be fecked if the last thing I was to hear was a concerted belly rumble from the primordial puss of punditry.

And so the gods sniggered at my/our plight….my/.our pain…..oh the pain…damn you Stents, a curse on you Angina…..hell mend you you …you….pathetic Transient Ischaemic Attack..

Oh those with the attention span and perspicacity of a Kris-Boyd-like haemorrhoid (haemorrhoid is actually my own rhyming slang for him) can claim that immediate pressure-wise the Arabs deserved it; but in doing so surely….surely….they would have had to acknowledge that on that same basis and chances made, Celtic should already have scored an unassailable 242 goals….ish!

Anyway, as my symptomatic annihilation settled into the mere suspended animation of acceptance my ever-present psychotic and paranoic black crow cawed its feckin repetitious ear-worm……

“That’s life, that’s football and that’s dickhead commentators for you!” (I have a long simmering thesis on that subject sitting Vesuvius like over the Pompeii punditry where they will all be consumed by an eruption of their own verbal vomit, with only their words preserved in a flood of bullshite for future generations’ glee and ridicule.)

And so, as injury time beckoned …for the match of course this is now termed ‘added time’ … my twisted neck, bloodied nose and knees, and tortured soles (that refers to soles of my feet and is not a misspelling of souls!) it was indeed Injury time.

Mind you notwithstanding the above soulful outpouring (this time nothing to do with my feet), I hadn’t totally given up; that would have required at least acknowledging if not subscribe to the ridiculous  ‘Gerrard’ analysis  of…. ‘if games only lasted 87 minutes….’ or similar dross from the nasal nonentity (as time will show/is showing); but I did have that natural looming desperation of the chained captive and the ‘out of reach’ lit fuse crackling and heading inevitably to…..to….well maybe oblivion would have been an exaggeration, but let’s be honest a football fan’s fatalism knows no unplumbed vacuum.

I mean….a draw on the cards….and with the next day’s fixture looming….. the worst place to find yourself stuck/ensconced would be Perth for the next few days.

In my guts the Damoclean dread scythed; if Celtic didn’t come back with a couple of swashbuckling on target phaser salvos to rescue my sanity and more importantly our points gap, then the atmosphere in the city as all manner of Klingon life-forms materialised, would have me contemplating a future of Buddhist abstinence, spiritual isolation…..and possibly ‘getting utterly pished’.

But then ….oh then….the gloom vanquished as those fingers of quantum justice tipped a new spiral of dominoes.

Was it my imagination or as they fell did they number 32? did they settle in form of the number 32?

Whatever happened all I can honestly say is that what followed (as you can tell from the foregoing) was totally EXPECTED, PREDICTED and aesthetically CONJURED.

Oh how those playful little devious harbingers of fate, doom, destruction can mess with us – oh how feckin fickle they are!

As Spooky action at a distance came to the rescue, that throttling rope metamorphosed into the magical soaring cape of Kal-el invincibility and out of the crevasse of despondency I and generations past present and future soared.


And as the United net bulged so the fart-filled expectations of blue meanies across the yet to be civilised outer reaches of the universe were punctured and chemists were inundated with unfulfillable  demands for Anusol….It’s rumoured good old Haemorrhoid himself had to get a properly fitting pair of jeans.

Fingers hammered keys, blogs blogged and Paisley Road west confirmed its pre-eminence as a flowing putrid sewer of illiterate incoherence as the MSM scribblers freed their trapped wind and employed every aspect of their imagination to call the winning scores ‘late goals’.

Huns across alien empires grunted their sphincters with “I feckin knew it…I feckin hate them’s”…. and by myself in those sober contemplative terms the white dove – my other psychotic ever-present guru – jist whispered…”That’s the way you used to do it Matt”.

“Seven Points clear and it’s not new year”….my heart whistled…sang…chanted.

“Just Sunday to see through now and who knows……..32…..it’s a sign I tell you…..32”.

I looked out of my hotel window as the darkness swaddled the distant river in its darkness and the silver stars in their own sparkling sign-language conversed, smiled and chanted a wee ‘hail hail’ with each other.

And so as the following twenty four hours were to unfold…well all I can say is that the fair city heard not a brogue stepping stomp or creep…although the James Webb Telescope has reportedly detected the quantum ripples of kling-ons becoming kling-offs…as civilisation has once again got its arse wiped and the annoying piles scissored clean…..for a wee while anyway.

Well done the Perth Saints.

And so to “32”!

I looked down at my computer screen.

Thirty-two it announced…..THIRTY TWO Degrees Centigrade….PERTH ……Western Australia…..8 days into my trip,,,,only 2,500 miles to go ….Sydney….Sydney FC and Everton that’s the plan.

Mind you….me and plans…..who feckin knows.

After all my itinerary has already changed at least twice….no wait ..’thrice’  -(I’ve always wanted to use that word in a sentence – not in a poem where I needed a rhyme to go with my Chinese meal). But those events (including an exploding camper van which is why I am on a plane) can wait for another time and sleepless night but for the moment I need to go particularly as something small, black, with lots of legs has just crawled up my jeans’ leg….how the feck did that get on the plane?

But before I deal wae the wee nyaaf, I leave you with a thought …..

First there ids the occasional similarity between this Western Australia starburst and our own Scottish gateway to the highlands of imagination.

In both cases I have witnessed men in thongs and ladies in things similar to thongs…I suppose we might call them thing thongs.

The difference of course is that in that ‘fair city’ anyone wearing such garb is usually scampering wae the polis in chase; whereas in this Perth, those wearing such gear ARE the polis!

And so to Motherwell on Wednesday….I’ll tell you about that later, but the exploding camper van has a lot to answer for…..

Hail Hail for the moment

P.S.   A couple in the queue for the plane asked where I was heading. “Divine” I said.

“Divine? Where’s that?”

“Sydney” I replied.

They didn’t say anything just looked puzzled.

“One night in a dream or nightmare it will come to you” and I boarded.

Above article by ESTADIO

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November 17, 2022 6:04 am

Hardly seems as though the football has been away,but we play today at 845am. I’ve no doubt that ESTADIO will be there-unless he finds himself overcome by the emotion of being in Cheers,Sydney again.

Great to hear from him again,but his thought processes are sometimes a warning against mixing your medications!

A thing of beauty
November 17, 2022 6:24 am

Thanks for the article Eatadio. I’ve been to Australia loads of times but never been to Perth – in Australia or Scotland!!
Belated birthday wishes. I knew I’d miss someone out last night.
Thanks again to all for the support.

November 17, 2022 6:59 am

Evening all,

It’s approaching 6pm here….so off to game in a few minutes. NO BEERS TILL AFTERWARDS. To be fair most of the bars round here don’t pull down the shutters till 3 or 4 am.

Anyway here’s the banners from last night in Cheers Bar on Sydney’s George Street.


Hail hail

November 17, 2022 7:22 am

World Cup 2 draw :

Morning all. Was reading through the blog this morning. Struck me that there were Masonic undertones to the way the World Cup entrants were chosen, ie primarily napsters only . It had actually crossed my mind last night that it wasn’t the smartest way to run it. More I thought about that, the more I thought it should’ve been an open door, and not just those with an interest in nags plus a couple of others. However it was too late by then!!
So I do apologise for that. Totally unintentional and simply a case of me not thinking things through.
With that in mind ( these things eat at me – keep me awake 😬) I’ve trawled the blogs recent articles and comments ( last few days worth) and the following posters have all contributed to the blog, ( I truly hope I’ve not missed anyone ) I’ll fire up WC2 later today under exactly the same conditions as WC1.

Stick of Rock
Ger 57
Belmont Brian
Frodsham Bhoy
Steve Naive
Billy Bhoy
Bluegrass Celt
Sol Kitts
Iniquitous 1V
Auldbhoy 67
Calton Tongues
Pity Mevin
Al Mor
** 16 Roads
** The real McCoy
** Jobo

** I was 3 short so I chose three at random from original draw to make up numbers:

Teams drawn shortly. Ta.

November 17, 2022 7:25 am


Cheers certainly looks like some place! Macjay told me about 18 months ago that it was the ONLY place to be in Sydney if you were a Tim.

Enjoy the match,I’m hoping to find a link to it. Oh,and enjoy the beers afterwards too!

November 17, 2022 7:33 am

Teams up…

Siegrist, Ralston, Welsh, Starfelt, Bernabei, Abildgaard, Ideguchi, Turnbull, Abada, Kyogo, Forrest

November 17, 2022 7:39 am


Once again,your generosity knows no bounds. Thanks,mate.

November 17, 2022 7:39 am

Is game being televised anywhere?

November 17, 2022 7:40 am

It’s not generosity…. It’s guilt 😁

November 17, 2022 7:53 am
November 17, 2022 7:54 am


Aye,yon guilt gets us every time!

November 17, 2022 7:58 am

If you already subscribe to Celtic TV then you can get the game live unless you live in OZ 🦘

November 17, 2022 8:07 am

Morning all,


November 17, 2022 8:12 am

Here’s a 10 min video to get you in the mood for the game

November 17, 2022 8:13 am


Got it on tic tv on the stick.

November 17, 2022 8:19 am
November 17, 2022 8:27 am

Watching these old matches on tic tv – forgot how good Craig Bellamy was for us.

November 17, 2022 8:46 am

Good Morning Bhoys,

Masterful Eastadio…

Ready fot KO – embdee got sound on Celtic TV?

Hail Hail

November 17, 2022 8:57 am

Morning folks … got this on hesgoal with a great picture and sound Chairbhoy

Estadio – gee whizz.. 👏🏻

November 17, 2022 8:58 am

Jeezo sleeping on runners and a great save by Siegrest

November 17, 2022 9:02 am

Not much of a crowd,is it?

November 17, 2022 9:04 am


I wish he’d been a bit better against Motherwell.

November 17, 2022 9:05 am

Bobby no apart from Celtic End..,

My link just went back start of he game … 🤓

November 17, 2022 9:05 am


November 17, 2022 9:10 am


November 17, 2022 9:12 am


November 17, 2022 9:21 am

Unbelievable… was away for only a few mins and missed 2 goals!

Billy Bhoy
November 17, 2022 9:27 am

Bugger! Fire stick jumped back 5 mins so I came off Celtic TV then clicked back in. Missed both goals!

November 17, 2022 9:34 am

Aye missed both goals … a classic by no means, but a nice way to spend a Thursday morning

November 17, 2022 9:44 am

Morning all
As per my earlier post- draw made for WC2. Will copy across to naps page too for easy reference ( for me)
Apologies for the rather clumsy effort on the initial draw. Gl all


World Cup winner. £20 free bet.

Runners up £10 free bet

Team conceding most group goals – £5 bet. If tied – earliest goal conceded wins.

Best 3rd place side from groups – £5 bet

Brazil. Calton Tongues

Argentina. Friedsorfer

France. CFC

England. Sol Kitts

Spain. Pitymelvin

Germany. 16 Roads

Netherlands. SFTB

Portugal. Mike in Toronto

Belgium. Ger57

Denmark. TLR

Uruguay. The Real McCoy

Croatia. Mad Mitch

Switzerland. Matt ( estadio)

Serbia. Auldheid

Mexico. Mags

Poland. Billy Bhoy

Senegal. Al Mor

USA. Magua

Ecuador. Blue grass Celt

Wales. Bournesouprecipe

Japan. Belmont Brian

Morocco. BAD

South Korea. McCargo

Cameroon. Frodshambhoy

Ghana. Inquitious1v

Iran. Auldbhoy67

Australia. Sunnyside

Canada. Steve Naive

Qatar. Jobo

Costa Rica. Stick of rock

Saudi Arabia. Tim Horton

Tunisia. ChairBhoy

November 17, 2022 9:55 am

Twisty fair play to ye on WC #2

CFC Bonjour mon frère…

November 17, 2022 9:58 am

On them now Celts – have they been in our box 2nd half (55mins)

November 17, 2022 10:00 am

Playing some clever football here now. All that’s missing is the finish

November 17, 2022 10:02 am

Cmon Jota… get that in the net 😬

November 17, 2022 10:02 am

One attack and they score 2-1

November 17, 2022 10:02 am

Is this tournament supposed to be netting Celtic a few million?
Haven’t got pictures but I hear the crowd is very poor.

Can’t imagine Everton making up the interest shortfall. How is this tournament making money?

Twisty SeS

Bonjour, thanks for WC#2
Allez les bleus.
Delighted with my draw!
France v England is a possible quarter final I understand. As if an excuse is needed to support ABE.

November 17, 2022 10:03 am

Incredible. Like the CL all over again.

November 17, 2022 10:04 am

Quality finish mind ye

November 17, 2022 10:09 am

I believe there are 4 different sponsors of the tournament. I’ll assume they’re putting up the dough.

bada Bing 1
November 17, 2022 10:13 am

Whatever happened to the World Cup Sweep team……..

November 17, 2022 10:13 am

This is murder.

Not the game, quality actually pretty decent. We’re playing nice football.

Nah. What’s murder is having a fair referee. Not used to this fair play stuff. I need to vent some anger somewhere. Bring on Don Robertson or the likes.

November 17, 2022 10:19 am


Thanks for the reply.
By the sounds of it, might be the first and last.

bada Bing 1
November 17, 2022 10:51 am

Final ball been poor for a few games now

November 17, 2022 11:03 am

For those watching what was the verdict?

Embarrassing defeat?

Highlights the need for a squad clear out?

Or a jolly that doesn’t really matter.?

16 roads
November 17, 2022 11:17 am
November 17, 2022 11:27 am

That was without a shadow of doubt one of the weirdest games I have been present at. Half time we were lucky to be drawing….second half we blew them away…chance after chance after chance… and not just any old chances, these were “gilt edged, onion bag sitting in pre bulge expectation” chances.. and then?
Well stone the bin bag chickens which are more prevalent than crows .they had a breakaway- wan frigging attack and scored….we then had another barrowload of back to front wave after wave of tackle, pass, turn, shoot and…..fuck me ball hits defender, our own player, a fuckin invisible wall or whatever.. I’ll put it down to jetlag lag…or possibly the fact that no-one telt the team that the stadium beer sales were for the fans!

November 17, 2022 11:28 am

“We were well off it today”…

November 17, 2022 11:32 am

I honestly felt we played some decent stuff, stringing some nice moves together. Middle to front very good. As has been our failing on more than one occasion we were well off it at the back and we aren’t converting enough of those chances our play creates. Cool head needed on a few occasions. Positives AND negatives really.

At the back? Same old same old. Simply not strong enough. We get cut open so easily.

Looks like we have more than enough to win the league but a number of changes required in the next window. Two strong defenders need and possibly a solid holding midfielder.

I’m not overly concerned. Listening to that recent interview with Ange, he made it clear he knows the likes of Juranovic and others is likely to move on, but seemed happy stating that it would allow him to bring in better quality.
It’s inconceivable he’s not realised he needs better players to progress in the CL. Has he discussed with MN? Or other board members? It sounds as if he has.

I hate getting my hopes up but for the first time in as long as I can remember, in fact first time ever in my years of following Celtic, we may actually have a medium to long term strategy.

November 17, 2022 11:43 am


Thoughts on the game appreciated.
Same failings front and back by the sounds of it.
Our undoing where it matters.

I agree, a strategy seems to be in play.
Much work is required in creating a competitive, capable squad.
A turnover of half to two thirds of the 25.

November 17, 2022 11:58 am

Morning fron work

Never saw the game. Reading the comments it seems like we missed a fair few chances a la Champions League. Unless standards in Oz have improved dramatically since my time there I’d doubt Sydney were anything lIKe CL standard.

Saying that I was quite surprised we played as soon aa we did after arriving as it usually took me about a week to get over the jetlag there so not surprised we lost. Everton game will be different- I remember from Sydney that both Liverpool clubs have big local supports so will be a bigger crowd and hopefully players are match fit.